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She was very shortly going to rue not tidying it up. ‘What are you doing now?’ she exclaimed. With great difficulty – Lynn nearly broke free – I managed to stretch across and grab the brush. ‘I’m going to teach you a lesson you won’t forget!’ I meant it too – nobody, and I mean nobody, spits in my face! ‘You’ll be taught a lesson in COURT!’ she retorted with spirit. I didn’t facking care. I beat her hard with the wood of the brush, once again across each very red buttock. ‘PLEASE, PLEASE, STOP!’ I merely thrashed her harder. ‘I’ve had enough of your selfish manipulation, your little mind games… your contrived moods to get you’re own way. Report me to the police and have me prosecuted – I really don’t give a FACK!’ After about twenty swats I became aware of a change in her: she ceased hollering and the crying reduced to a gentle sniffing – her unclad body became pliant. I felt compelled to loosen my hold of her. She twisted with some effort her flushed, perspiring and good looking. Why was I suddenly dreaming about Becky? Was Taylor right? She seemed certain Becky still loved me. It was just a dream and dreams often don't make any sense, but this one was particularly vivid. Was I just "passin' through"? She was beautiful and smart and ... damn ... she did have great legs.Could she, or any woman, ever fill the hole in my chest where my heart used to be? And what about Amelia? In my grief I had pictured myself growing old as the lonely widower raising a daughter on my own ... but that was grief talking, not reality. What would it really be like to raise Amelia on my own? Lots of parents do it, but I had discovered that parenting and running a ranch was a two person job. And more importantly, would Abigail want me to go through life without being loved, and loving someone in return? I couldn't imagine it.I had lots of questions and few answers.Maybe I should just ask Amelia ... she seemed to be doing okay running our lives so far.As I shaved, I looked at myself..
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